Ator the Invincible (1982)

"The earth trembles like a virgin being drawn to the nuptial den." - soldier

aka: Ator the Fighting Eagle
A warrior goes on a quest to fulfill his destiny.
Starring: Miles O'Keeffe, Sabrina Siani, Ritza Brown, Edmund Purdom

Link to IMDB

There's an endless supply of Conan rip-offs, and as long as I keep finding them I'll keep watching them.

In a dark age of swords and sorcery the evil Spider King has ruled the lands for 1000 years, but ancient prophecies speak of a hero that will arrive to overthrow him. One day, a baby is born with a unique birthmark, and it seems that this might be the promised hero. The Spider King goes Old Testament on everyone's ass and starts killing all the babies in his kingdom! A mysterious priest hides the infant in a small village with a family of farmers, where he will be safe to grow into adulthood.
20 years later and the child has become a strong young man named Ator. He lives at peace with his family and his sister, Sunya, that he's fallen in love with. Ator's not aware he's adopted, so there's some funny moments when the two contemplate marriage.
Anyways, it's not long before evil soldiers come snooping around and attack the village! Sunya gets kidnapped and Ator barely escapes with his life. The priest that rescued him as a baby returns, and he's actually a warrior named Griba that reveals Ator's true heritage and destiny, and begins to train him for the battles ahead.

Ator: "Why can't we marry?"
Sunya: "We are brother and sister."
Ator: [thoughtful pause] "I'll talk with our father."

Griba and Ator train for awhile, but our hero is soon on his quest to stop the Spider King and rescue Sunya. Typical adventuring ensues for awhile, as Ator meets and battles Amazonians, witches and brutes, and although this all provides some action and laughs it also begins to run out of steam. Some scenarios go on forever just to pad the run time.
When Ator meets Roon, a beautiful warrior that wants to help him, they become traveling companions and the pace picks-up again as they get closer to the Spider King's indomitable fortress.

Roon

Griba

The story tries hard to be a mystical and epic adventure, but it mostly falls flat on that attempt. There are almost no special effects or monsters and the fights are often brief, leaving us to watch the characters as they stumble around low budget sets trying not to fall into the plot holes that are everywhere.
The movie is rated PG, which is rare for this genre, and the "family friendly" tone feels like a bad decision. The best aspect is probably the humour, there are lots of intentional and unintentional laughs to be found as Ator fights and charms his way to become the hero that was foretold.

Spider King and friends

Be sure not to miss:
- Ator has a pet bear cub with him for the whole movie. It does nothing except run around and play, but he adds to the charm of the story.
- That's the biggest bowl of Kraft Dinner I've ever seen!
- The sappy love ballad at the end sounds suspiciously like For Your Eyes Only, from James Bond.

Internet review:
"I’ve seen better storylines from my D&D buddies back in high school." - Mattmos

Should I watch it?
It's not a waste, but also not a classic of the genre.

Where can I find it?
The movdix link here.

Ator the Invincible gets...