Don't Tell Her it's Me (1990)

"I am Lobo. I hunt alone. I need no one." - Gus

aka: The Boyfriend School
A lonely guy creates a new identity in an attempt to find true love.
Starring: Steve Guttenberg, Shelley Long, Jami Gertz, Kyle MacLachlan, Kevin Scannell

Link to IMDB

Gus Kubicek has successfully finished battling cancer, but the ordeal has left him feeling depressed and without any confidence now that all his hair has fallen out and he looks like a lumpy slob. Luckily, his sister Lizzie is eager to help Gus get reinvigorated and find him a girlfriend.

The movie drags on for 40 minutes with Gus being an awkward guy that has no self-esteem, but he does meet a beautiful lady named Emily that he begins to have a crush on. It's too bad that Emily isn't interested in dating a guy she sees only as a sad sack, and she's debating on going back to her ex, a sleazy guy named Trout.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Lizzie and Gus come up with a plan to reinvent him as a super stud. One training/makeover montage later, and Gus is reborn as the tough and rugged biker named Lobo.


This new Lobo persona starts appearing in Emily's life (because apparently Gus is a pro stalker,) and she's instantly swooning for him. At first Gus loves being Lobo, but as he and Emily get closer he begins to hate the fact that he's been lying to her. He wants the truth to be revealed, but will Emily still love him!?

 Lizzie                                  Emily                                   Trout

This movie could have been a lot better with two adjustments. First of all, it moves way too slow and Lobo isn't introduced until more than halfway through. Secondly, it would have worked much better as a comedy, but instead it aims to be a very predictable and prudent romance that would only appeal to lonely old people that don't want their feathers ruffled.
The movie has no edge. It's as safe and tepid as white bread.

Lobo in action

Pretty much the only highlight here is that Gus/Lobo is a likeable guy (despite using deception to get close to Emily,) and Guttenberg does a good job of playing both personalities with the right energy. He and Shelley Long do generate a few laughs, but the material they're working with is very bland.


Does the movie deliver on the Don't...
7 out of 10
It becomes the main premise, but of course we know it won't last forever.

Be sure not to miss:
- Madchen Amick and Beth Grant make appearances.
- The opening credits have wacky animations, and a terrible theme song.
- This...

Internet review:
"It was ridiculous, but in a supremely annoying and cringe worthy way." - kiddcoppola

Should I watch it?
Don't.

Where can I find it?
Links here.

Don't Tell Her it's Me gets...