Malibu Beach (1978)

"Nobody, but nobody, calls Dugi a turd."  - Dugan

Everyone's at the beach, and I'm just sitting on the couch in the dark watching them.
Starring: Kim Lankford, James Daughton, Steve Oliver, Susan Player

Link to IMDB

Dina

School's out for all the Californian teens and they head to Malibu beach to celebrate their freedom. Dina decides to be a lifeguard for the summer, which attracts all the attention of the boys and her co-worker, Dugan, a cocky older guy that thinks he's king of the beach. The movie is going for an American Graffiti vibe as everyone just drives around, drinks beers, and develop crushes on each other... but damn is it boring. There's no plot, just stuff happening to characters we barely even know or care about.

There's a couple of cops on patrol, but instead of harshing on everyone's vibe they get caught up in the partying, too, which is a nice change of pace for a beach party movie.

Dugan

Bobby and Paul are the main guys, and they get into a rivalry with Dugan. Wow, it's almost like some plot is going to appear! Dugan and the boys get into fights and car chases, trying to settle who is the toughest. Dugan is a real ass, but he's also the only character of any interest and becomes the main reason to follow what's happening. Everyone else is just too generic.
Well, except for the dog that keeps stealing bikini tops from girls while they sunbathe! It's always a treat when this perverted canine shows up, because we get to see a character that actually does something and it gives some laughs among all the tedium.




Sure, there is lots of partying, but it's just delivered so matter-of-factly that it feels very dry. It even eschews most of the cheesiness you might expect, and stays pretty tasteful (despite carefree nudity.) Instead of rock 'n roll, most of the songs are sappy love ballads, because the search for some mellow romance is what the characters focus on.
There are some good moments, but it's just a generic drive-in movie designed to be watched while you make-out with someone in a car. Not exactly interesting in any other circumstance.

Be sure not to miss:
- The dog steals seven bikinis, and seems to have hoarded even more!
- That is one crazy jukebox.
- The shark burps.
- We've seen Dugan before! Steve Oliver played the same character in The Van.

Internet review:
"Celebrate nothingness and go to the beach." Yum-Yum

Should I watch it?
No, it's just too boring. But since I mentioned The Van, just go watch that again instead.

Where can I find it?
Here on YouTube.

Malibu Beach gets...